Jogging is bad for your health

17 Mar

Jogging is very hazardous to one’s health as shown by these recent headlines.

First we have a jogger hit BY A FUCKING PLANE while jogging on a beach:
Jogger hit by Plane

Pharmaceutical salesman Robert Gary Jones, listening to his iPod while jogging, likely never saw or heard it before the aircraft hit him from behind Monday evening and killed him.

“There’s no noise,” said aviation expert Mary Schiavo, a former inspector general for the National Transportation Safety Board. “So the jogger, with his ear buds in, and the plane without an engine, you’re basically a stealth aircraft. Who would expect to look up?”



A teacher was mauled to death by a pack of wolves, Alaska state troopers revealed today.

The body of Candice Berner, 32, was found surrounded by wolf tracks near the village of Chignik Bay, 500 miles south-west of the capital Anchorage.
A post-mortem examination said the cause of death was ‘multiple injuries due to animal mauling’.

Then there is the jogger KILLED BY A FUCKING TREE:

Trees are such assholes

PHILADELPHIA – A woman jogging in a Philadelphia park has been killed by a falling tree branch just days after a similar incident in New York’s Central Park left a man comatose.

and finally, the jogger DISMEMBERED ALIVE BY ALLIGATORS:

Even in Florida, nobody who heads out for an evening jog in a suburban neighborhood expects to be attacked and killed by an alligator. But that is what happened to Yovy Suarez Jimenez, a 28-year-old biology student, who took one fatal step too close to a canal.

Sunrise, a dormitory community north of Fort Lauderdale, was in shock yesterday as the medical examiner confirmed that Ms Jimenez was grabbed and dismembered by an alligator.

for gods sake people, stop jogging and stay home. How many times have we heard something along the lines of “the last time anyone saw Jane Doe alive, she was jogging alone etc etc.”

DO YOU WANT TO BE EATEN BY WOLVES??? Do you??? I sure don’t. No jogging for me.


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