Metrome

5 Jul

I’ve come to the realization that I fit the parameters of metrosexual:

  • I go tanning once every 2 weeks or so (to keep legs and butt from becoming ghostly white)
  • I have a Pouf
  • Most my work clothes (button up shirts, ties, pants etc) are either from Banana Republic or Express Men
  • I own many pairs of shoes, and my work shoes are all at least $150 a pair
  • I exfoliate
  • I layer scents
  • I found myself looking up Ironing tips online today
  • I match my curtains to my sofa
  • I know a lot about wine
  • I spend a lot of money on moisturizers
  • I find myself wondering if my cufflinks match the outfit

I’m not sure how this happened, but I imagine that it’s preparatory work for my eventual role as super evil criminal mastermind, as those types are always well-dressed.

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6 Responses to “Metrome”

  1. son_of_ottie July 5, 2006 at 3:54 pm #

    Just make sure to tell the girls they ARE prettier than you and you will have it MADE!

    • bboyneko July 5, 2006 at 3:58 pm #

      it would be a lie.

      • son_of_ottie July 5, 2006 at 4:09 pm #

        I wanted to forge something poetic out of something profane to post here. But this week has made me too tired.
        So crassly, YOU know it’s a lie and THEY know it’s a lie. They still wanna fuck ya! Just tell ’em what they need to hear.

  2. ermamo July 5, 2006 at 9:58 pm #

    lol, figures. The easiest test for metrosexual is “Do you think you could be a metrosexual?” If the answer is “Yes”, then you are.
    It’s getting harder and harder to find men that aren’t afraid to get dirty or grow the hair out on their balls. wtf?

    • bboyneko July 5, 2006 at 11:56 pm #

      hey my balls are plenty hairy

      • ermamo July 6, 2006 at 5:47 pm #

        lol

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